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Return To Shop8 things you must do before you taste the forbidden fruit
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When we’re single, how should we approach our feelings? Waiting passively for love to fall into our laps will inevitably lead to missed opportunities, but blindly seizing love will only harm both ourselves and others. Taking the initiative and confidently pursuing love will prevent it from being ruined by our own misguided efforts.
1. Believe in love, but don’t be superstitious about it.
I believe that everlasting love exists, but expecting it to transcend everything is unrealistic. This understanding helps us avoid being superstitious about love and makes us less prone to heartbreak and despair. In teen dramas, love seems to conquer all, and it’s portrayed as incredibly romantic. In reality, love is just one part of life.
2. Can enter and exit
When you’re deeply in love, you can be completely absorbed, but when the outcome comes, reason must prevail. Only then can you maintain control in the relationship. In many cases, I often see too many women who lack love and make their partners the center of their lives. They can indeed be completely absorbed when they’re in love, but this constant state of self-absorption will only leave them battered and bruised.
3. A proactive and rational attitude
When we’re single, how should we approach our feelings? Waiting passively for love to fall into our laps will inevitably lead to missed opportunities, but blindly seizing love will only harm both ourselves and others. Taking the initiative and confidently pursuing love will prevent it from being ruined by our own misguided efforts.
4. Possessing the capacity to love
In this regard, I must emphasize that the capacity for love includes not only the ability to love others, but also the ability to cherish oneself. The capacity to love others includes the ability to give, the ability to understand, the ability to forgive, and the ability to take responsibility for oneself. Don’t expect your partner to share everything with you; there are many things we still need to face alone.
Giving is more beneficial to love than taking, and it also brings more happiness. Forgiveness has unexpected effects on love; what demands and criticism cannot achieve, forgiveness may. The ability to love yourself means believing in yourself, cherishing yourself, and treating yourself well.
5. Have some psychological flexibility
Enjoy the intimacy of love, accept the distance of your lover, and skillfully balance tension and relaxation. Cherish what you have, and move on quickly when you lose it, without endlessly reminiscing about the past. “If love between two people lasts forever, why should they be together every day?” and “Those destined to meet will meet even if they are thousands of miles apart; those not destined to be together will find it difficult to hold hands even when they are face to face.” These two lines are proverbs about fate that I greatly admire.
In love, we experience so much pain mostly because we demand too much. Please remember to be at ease with whatever comes your way and find peace in whatever situation you encounter!
6. Understand some psychology of love
The state of being seemingly within reach yet unattainable easily fuels emotions, and this can be used to intensify the romantic atmosphere. When a lover encounters setbacks, they need comfort most. Love is a science, and love is also an art. In the past, we experienced love; now, we express love; and in the future, we envision the beautiful realm of love.
7. Have some economic foundation
While material wealth and love aren’t necessarily proportional, a certain level of material foundation is definitely beneficial for the healthy development of a relationship. Love that’s detached from practical needs is unlikely to last. Economics doesn’t determine the length of a relationship, nor the intensity of happiness. When we are hungry, our happiness increases with more money. But once we’ve reached a point of basic needs being met, our happiness doesn’t necessarily increase proportionally with more money.
8. Reserve a piece of love for yourself
As mentioned earlier, loving yourself is a prerequisite. Loving yourself means accepting yourself, and the more you accept yourself, the more you can accept others. Love is not about one person pleasing another, nor is it about one person draining energy from another; love is an interaction between two individuals with independent personalities.
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