How to Handle a Female Colleague Who Won’t Leave My Boyfriend Alone

　My boyfriend and I work at the same company, which is quite small. We’re not in the same department, but the girl I live with works in the same department. She’s very close to both me and my boyfriend. Many people have told me there’s something going on between them. At first, I didn’t think anything of it, but later I started to have my suspicions. One time, my boyfriend and I were on a date when he suddenly received a call from her. She was crying and begging him to come pick her up. I could tell my boyfriend seemed a little nervous, so he said, “Don’t move, I’m coming right now.”

　I was heartbroken when I heard that. The girl was very outgoing and open-minded. I think she used to be a prostitute, but I’m not entirely sure; I just sensed it from her conversations. She mentioned she used to be in Shanghai, and all her friends were prostitutes. What I admire about her is that she had three boyfriends, but they’ve all broken up now. One of them works at our company, and they’re still very close; it seems they sometimes have sex.

Once, she actually told my boyfriend she wanted to go to a hotel with him. My boyfriend told her, “He has me, he loves me!” I only found out later, so I didn’t say anything. She even kissed my boyfriend in front of him before, and made him kiss her too, and he kissed her back. What am I to her? Afterwards, she asked me if I was angry, and I just smiled and told her it was nothing, but actually I was really angry!

　　My boyfriend is my first love. I tried breaking up with him, and I was very sad. In the end, he cried and begged me to stay, saying he loved me very much, and we got back together. Actually, I can’t let him go either; I love him very deeply. Any couple encountering such a “dark horse” in their relationship would inevitably feel angry and resentful! Although I always adhere to the principle of “speaking up for women,” I have to say: there are indeed some girls in society who really don’t know how to respect themselves!

　　This “love rival” might not ultimately steal your beloved boyfriend, but she’ll certainly give you a real headache. It’s clear your boyfriend doesn’t actually have “love” for this girl, and he probably doesn’t even like her.

“Flirtatious”—your relationship is still stable and solid. From this perspective, this man isn’t at the point where he absolutely has to be dumped, and your relationship can absolutely continue.

　　But the problem now is: what if this girl keeps pestering him? Even the strongest love can’t withstand the constant gnawing of ants; sooner or later, cracks will appear under the teeth of these little creatures. It’s said that it’s hard for a man to pursue a woman, but easy for a woman to pursue a man; if a woman is constantly giving him advances, even the most steadfast man will waver. The reason this girl keeps pestering him is because she feels she has a chance of winning!

　　You should discuss it with your boyfriend, and both of you should make a move: make her realize that she has no role in your relationship. You and your boyfriend should be more determined; now more than ever, you should show even more love and trust. Actually, from your letter, it’s clear that in your boyfriend’s heart, your position far surpasses that of that girl. Don’t be discouraged; sometimes love needs to be defended! Women’s Experience Network wishes you happiness!

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How to Handle a Female Colleague Who Won’t Leave My Boyfriend Alone