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Return To ShopThe Root of Our Desire to Pursue the Opposite Sex, Explained
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What is sexual desire?
Sexual desire refers to the craving for sex. Sexologists generally believe that sexual desire is an instinctive desire that is beneficial for reproduction. As for most animals, sexual desire only exists during estrus, and estrus in animals is usually a seasonal occurrence of sexual desire.
The emergence of human sexual desire
Sexual desire begins at the onset of puberty. During puberty, the levels of hormones in both men and women gradually increase, leading to the maturation of sexual function and a growing intensity of sexual desire. Suppression of this desire can cause adolescent sexual anxiety. Male sexual desire radiates outwards from the genitals, while female sexual desire concentrates from the periphery of the body towards the genitals. Men satisfy their sexual needs by desiring intercourse and experiencing pleasure through ejaculation. Women, on the other hand, can satisfy their sexual needs through various sources such as sexual fantasies, caresses, kissing, and intercourse. The occurrence of sexual desire is related to the physiological basis of both sexes: firstly, the endocrine system, composed of sex hormones and gonads, maintains the basic tension and excitability of sexual desire in both sexes; secondly, the nervous system, composed of the cerebral cortex, spinal cord hypoerectomy centers, erogenous zones, and conduction nerves, ensures the body’s timely and effective response to the environment.
Human sexual desire and age
Women’s libido differs significantly from men’s. While men’s sexual urges mostly occur during puberty, this isn’t the case for women. Many women experience slight vaginal bleeding and increased vaginal discharge during ovulation. This ample vaginal lubrication is ideal for sperm to swim smoothly into the uterus and fertilize the egg. Therefore, women during ovulation often experience a light, subtle, and intensely tingling sensation, and they are more receptive to the opposite sex than usual, showing a greater need for and responsiveness to sexual stimulation. According to a survey, libido changes with age. Generally, it peaks around age 30, and afterwards varies depending on individual physiology and physical condition.
When is a person’s libido strongest?
Ages 20-30. At this time, men have prominent Adam’s apples, deeper voices, and grow facial hair. Their libido is at its peak; they are quickly aroused, have a strong sex drive, and can become aroused again quickly after orgasm, experiencing sexual desire almost daily. Women at this age have delicate skin, high-pitched voices, are shy and reserved in sexual matters, and have a lower sex drive.
31-40 years old. With age and increased sexual experience, male sexual function begins to decline, but their ability to control themselves increases, allowing for greater control during sex, and their sexual desire becomes more regular. Women gain a better understanding of their bodies and know how to achieve and enjoy orgasm.
Ages 41-50. Male libido gradually declines, and sexual arousal requires more time and stimulation. However, at this age, men can be more considerate and tender in satisfying their partners’ sexual needs. Women’s libido is high, and their sexual desire reaches its peak, exceeding that of men.
Ages 51-60. Women’s sexual desire begins to decrease, and the sexual needs of both partners become more harmonious.
Ages 61-70. Sexual function declines for both partners, making caressing, kissing, and hugging the main themes of intimacy. This allows older adults to enjoy their later years more comfortably.
For those over 70, a US study suggests that losing a partner or choosing to live alone at this age increases the risk of various diseases. Conversely, living together increases lifespan. Experts advise that healthy seniors can still enjoy sex, but should do so within their limits.
How to increase sexual desire
1. Get enough sleep. Numerous studies have confirmed that good, sufficient sleep is a major way to improve sexual performance. Furthermore, when you sleep well, the body’s various systems become more responsive. When the brain receives sexual stimulation, it will respond more actively.
2. Use medication with caution. Many medications, such as various antidepressants, diuretics, cholesterol-lowering drugs, and anti-inflammatory drugs, can affect libido and sexual performance. Patients should closely monitor the regularity and satisfaction of their sex life while using these medications. If problems arise, they should consult with a doctor promptly to choose alternative treatments and minimize the impact of the medications on sexual function.
3. Control blood pressure. High blood pressure in men can easily lead to hypertension and arteriosclerosis, which can significantly affect erectile function and sexual response.
4. Quit smoking and drinking. Both smoking and drinking can numb the central nervous system, significantly slowing down the response to various external stimuli. In sexual life, this manifests as a dulled response to sexual stimulation or other sexual dysfunctions, such as premature ejaculation in men and delayed orgasm in women.
5. Maintain regular exercise. Good physical condition is crucial for a fulfilling sex life, but choosing the right exercise is important. For example, cycling is not recommended. Prolonged cycling can severely compress the perineum for both men and women. For men, this may lead to erectile dysfunction (ED); for women, it may cause numbness in the perineum and a significant decrease in sexual pleasure. Activities like jogging and walking are good choices and suitable for most people.
6. Balanced diet. Healthy eating habits improve blood vessel health, thereby enhancing blood supply to the reproductive organs. Furthermore, balanced nutrition can lower cholesterol levels in men and slow down arteriosclerosis.
7. Mental Health. Emotional trauma can also cause low libido, a phenomenon more common among young people. Tension, anxiety, depression, stress, fear, and negative past sexual experiences can all lower people’s expectations of a fulfilling sex life and even lead to aversion to sexual activity. If you find yourself experiencing any of these psychological problems, you should seek help from a sex therapist promptly.
8. Regularly assess your relationship. Low libido is closely related to marital relationships. For example, a lack of communication can cause couples to grow distant, both physically and emotionally. Therefore, it is recommended that couples sit down regularly to talk about their feelings and rekindle the sweetness of their love.
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